Make fun of me if you must, but atleast I have the nerve & courage to be real!
As of today, I am 10 weeks and 2 days into my third pregnancy. When I was weighed at my first prenatal appointment I was completely shocked by my current weight (a number I've never seen before, and I'm not even pregnant enough to really be gaining weight!) I was already aware from playing wii fit that I my weight has been yo-yoing, with some days the game not letting me play because I exceeded the weight limit (of 330 pounds!!!) Oh my Frick.
At my visit with the Intake Prenatal Nurse, I was even 10 pounds over that! Honestly, I refuse to gain any weight during this pregnancy or ever weight more than 350 (I thought 300 would be my cap when I started gaining but apparently NOT). During my previous pregnancies my M.D. has expressed being A-okay with me not gaining weight throughout the entire pregnancy without me even asking, but I still always gained weight anyway! With Natalie I started at 295 & delivered at 324 (I've been overweight for a long time ... like since childhood.... so sue me!) With Bridget I began around 315 & finished around 345. During both pregnancies I lost weight in the middle from healthy dietary changes!
I don't believe my doctor will have an issue with me losing weight during this pregnancy. I will not starve my body or my baby in any sort of way, rather just be a little more active and eat more healthy food and less of the crappy foods. I haven't seen my OB yest this pregnancy & will definitely talk with her first before proceeding. However, losing weight will probably help more than hinder the pregnancy. Super big people lose more weight than those just needing to drop 10 pounds (I need to go at least 150 from start to finish .... and of course NO, not all during pregnancy!)
While I've been lucky enough to have pretty stable health despite my enormous weight, blood pressure is good, heart is super healthy etc, those are all "for now" conditions I believe, and won't stay that way unless I make some changes!
During a recent meeting with a intake nurse, we determined if I would totally give up regular soda it would mean nearly 100 pounds in 1 year alone! Combine that with no fast food & Woo Hoo! That's some stuff to think about right there! While I'm writing this I'm working on a 20 oz. bottle of code red mountain dew with a total of 275 calories... ouch!
THE REASONS I WANT TO LOSE WEIGHT:
--- While I know being smaller won't solve all of life's problems, I have a feeling it would help in many types of ways:
1. When the girls make huge messes, I won't get so angry about hauling my fat ass over to clean it up. Since getting pregnant my energy level is zero and I'm so sick of doing the same tasks over & over. My temper & patience is at an all time low. I honestly believe that if I didn't have so much weight to hoist around all day long, mundane tasks wouldn't seem so hideous and overbearing!
2. I want to be able to keep up with the kids and be more active with them as well. I know monster weight is affecting this area of my life for sure!
3. I want to feel attractive again. I have felt gorgeous even plus-size, but it's not possible when you have to buy the biggest size the store offers (and that's if you're at the fat girl store!) & always look 8 months pregnant even when your last baby was born a year and a half ago!
4. I want to be alive for it all during my kids lives; I'm a short roller coaster ride to a very early death at the rate I'm going. Nothing in life freaks me out more than my kids not having a mom during all of their tough questions and life events.
5. I need to set good examples for my children. Children learn and live by seeing and doing, and primarily from their parents!
6. I want to keep up; I'm tired of feeling left behind on the sidelines!
7. I'm tired of being discriminated against. Eventually I will be done with school and want a real career, I can't be taken seriously for a criminal justice or a psychology job like this.
8. Only a couple semesters left & I have failed to take a 1 credit required general Ed. Physical Education Course!
9. This one's kind of dumb and out there. .... but if someone were stealing my child how would I catch them?
Ironically enough, I do not believe in medical interventions for weight loss. I think we as large people (myself included) know exactly what we do that makes us fat. For me it's eating too much salty & greasy food, drinking too much soda, and not moving around enough. While I understand that sometimes there are medical reasons for medical intervention weight loss, for the most part I look at Gastric Bypass/ Lap-band ect. as major cop-outs. I tend to believe most obese people know what they did to make themselves fat; and they know what to change & stop doing to make themselves less fat.
I know I sound like a bitch but on this point I really don't care. I don't buy the whole "I've tried everything else, and nothing works for me" line. I CALL BULL! It's practically impossible to continue gaining weight if you are consuming less calories then you burn off! I'm a complete math dummy and I understand this concept! UGH!
I admit it... I haven't EVER really legitimately tried to lose weight... there I said it! Not to keep venting here, but my other huge (hahaha) issue with surgical procedures for weight loss, is being put under for something not completely necessary (again I understand in some medical cases it is believed to be necessary) but when I had to be put under in December of 2007 I was terrified that I would die on the operating table during a minor procedure and my girls wouldn't have a mother. I just can't imagine doing that for something that could be changed on ones own. Trust me Keith has listened to me bitch about this a lot!
Pneumonia Knot-Head.
2 hours ago
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